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She was smart, humorous and to me
was absolutely gorgeous. The dates were fantastic and we got
along better than anything I have ever witnessed.
A few months along in the relationship, she sat me
down and did the one thing that the general tone here seems to say
over and over again not to do. She told me about her past. Not in
great detail, just that she had numerous partners and we are not
talking a small number here. I love her dearly, so I didn’t speak my
mind, but it bothers me considerably.
The fact that my wife told me she had two partners at
the same time sickens me. I know, I know, I should be more
open-minded, but it is disturbing. We continued onward through our
relationship, and I had learned to suppress the emotions, and
focused on the one thing that really mattered, the fact that I love
her and she loves me. The problem began after we had been married
for a while; a friend of mine confided in me that he had slept with
her before she met me. And he called her a “screamer”, which she
does make a lot of noise during intimacy. After that I was overcome
with jealousy. This is starting to cause arguments inside the
relationship. I don’t want to fight, especially over something that
doesn’t pertain to us.
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When I try to discuss my feelings with my wife she
becomes defensive and angry. It becomes a night of not
speaking; this doesn’t happen often, but it happens none the
less. My wife’s only response is “But I am here with you.”
And for some stupid reason that doesn’t seem to
satisfy me. My question is how do I convey to my wife how
badly this hurts, and is there something I can do to help
control an over active imagination. |
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This is starting to make me sexually unsure of
myself, and we have never had problems in the bedroom before.
I don't want to leave my wife. My wife in my eyes is the only woman
for me. But there has to be some way around this. Thank you for any
advice you can give.
RUNAWAY IMAGINATION
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Dr. Mark's Advice |
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